Re-setting

So I started organizing my home in December, and it is taking much longer than anticipated.

“The ability to simplify means
to eliminate the unnecessary
so that the necessary may speak.”
~ Hans Hofmann 

This year the physical de-cluttering is also a very intense emotional and mental process. I wonder at the energetic pull of objects I no longer need or haven’t used in years, yet still have a hard time letting go of. I have bursts of resoluteness where I put a lot in the give-away pile, but then find myself needing a break away from that space to process whatever I just yanked out of myself, figuratively speaking.

Everybody on the (dance) floor!

I know part of it comes with the shifts in my thinking over the past year as it relates to other life events. Letting go of old mantras and conditioning that the Radvent process clued me into since 2011. There have been paradigm shifts with regard to aging (round birthday coming up), productivity, value (as an artist as well as from a material perspective), traditions, and my role in this world.

“Three Rules of Work:
Out of clutter find simplicity;
From discord find harmony;
In the middle of difficulty lies opportunity.”
~ Albert Einstein

In shedding those old ideas, there are symbols I’ve accumulated in my home that need to go as well. After de-cluttering my living room for Christmas decorations, I just went through the sofa table again, because things were piling on yet again.

un-piling the pile-on

My studio has me wondering whether I am hoarder or if I will really implement those projects that I have lovely materials for. Like the to-read-in-2013 (or dump it)-bookshelf, some of my drawers will get time stamps, and whatever hasn’t been touched in a year (or maybe two) will need to find its way to someone else’s studio. Quilters joke about UFOs-UnFinished Objects-and I think a lot of us creative people are guilty of that.

So many scraps, so many ideas!

I really want my home to serve me as my life is now. Not as an aspiration for what it might be someday. That’s been another big shift in my thoughts. What if ‘someday’ never happens?

“People take different roads seeking fulfillment and happiness.
Just because they’re not on your road
doesn’t mean they’ve gotten lost.”
~ H. Jackson Brown

What if this home is my final home, and my relationship status remains the way it is right now? (Thanks, Mayan calendar!) No someday cottage (in a fairy-tale forest with magical helpers shoveling snow and providing maintenance). What if this is it? Same home, same neighborhood, same car, same life. Do I have to strive for something ‘bigger’?

The shelves are feng shui’d 

There is still room for nostalgia. My ruthlessness does not extend to throwing out childhood books and comics. The photo-box I’ve been meaning to convert to scrapbooks for years will eventually become an actionable project.

“Do not spoil what you have
by desiring what you have not;
remember that what you now have
was once among the things you only hoped for.”
~ Epicurus

But I am more conscious of whether other items reflect my values and lifestyle. I’m more aware of the energy I have in my sanctuary (which is what a home ultimately should be) and the energy I wish to exude on to the world.

Some boxes to tackle later

So as I process through all that, I’m extending the re-organizing project into February. My clothes will be a huge exercise in letting go of body aspirations, and there’s some real life to get back to prior to opening that can of worms.

“If you want to be happy, be.”
~ Leo Tolstoy

Soul-work cannot be checked off or catalogued the way a bookshelf or set of drawers can. The concept of Qi is certainly making itself known to me this month. Even though right now the process is difficult, the results will be worth it. Letting go is never easy, but unloading those bags of un-needed things to a charitable organization will feel very rewarding.

many bags full…

On that note, as I was having a bit of an existentialist crisis, Enlighten Up! did help me lighten up. We tend to put spiritualists on a pedestal for having figured out the ‘true meaning of life’ and this movie puts that in perspective quite well.

no regrets-or no rugrats?

What a wonderful life I’ve had!
I only wish I’d realized it sooner.
~ Colette